During the month of March 2022, the Rocks Before Sand blog will be focused on mental health. The topics discussed will include: anxiety, stress, mental health disorders, and suicide. Our goal in discussing these difficult topics is to make sure that our readers know that they are not alone in their struggles with mental health.  There is a GREAT GOD and loving community that knows and feels your hurt and we are here to support you through it. If you or your family members are suffering with any mental health issues please reach out to us, our partners, or professionals for support. 

National Alliance on Mental Illness - 1-800-950-NAMI (6264) or [email protected] https://www.nami.org/Home 

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline - 1-800-273-TALK (8255) https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ 

Rocks Before Sand contact - [email protected] 

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Mental Health Topic #2: Burnout

9 minute read
By Bethany Rees

I often get asked why I chose to leave education after 18 years in the profession. I mean, what about the millions of dollars left on the table with teacher retirement, right? (Lord, forgive my sarcasm.)

God's honest answer was that my stress led to absolute burnout. I am afraid that not only are other educators to the point of burnout, but tons of other professionals like healthcare workers, and I’m sure many more. 

So as we continue our discussion about mental health we must address the slippery slope from normal stress to extreme stress that crashes into burnout, and how this downward spiral takes a huge toll on people. 

Stress is NORMAL, but Needs to Be Monitored

Stress is our body's emotional and physical reaction to an unresolved problem or demand and is ultimately caused by lacking the time, know-how, and/or resources to resolve that problem or demand. 

Everyone experiences stress, and to be honest stress IS a normal part of life. Small amounts of stress are actually a good thing for overall healthy growth of an individual because it produces innovation, problem solving, resiliency, and perseverance. 

Teacher Side note: Parents, do not rescue your children from every little moment of stress…it will rob them of the healthy growth and skills they will need to be a functioning adult. 

There is not a single person that has the “perfect life” free of stress. If you are searching for that, STOP. It doesn’t exist. There is no perfect person, perfect marriage, perfect behaving children, or perfect job. And the continual search for the perfect life will have you constantly living in the “sand elements” of life because as Ecclesiastes 4:4 says, you’ll be chasing after the wind. 

And I saw that all toil and all achievement spring from one person’s envy of another. This too is meaningless, a chasing after the wind. 

If you would like to read more about how you might be the problem causing your stress, read my previous blog on being more productive and less stressed. 

Burnout is Different from Stress and is Not Normal

While stress is normal, it can morph into something abnormal and unhealthy.  Stress that is consistent can take its toll on us physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually; especially if we begin the slippery slope from stress to exhaustion to burnout. Thus this blog post is dedicated to those that are at the point of burnout caused by long bouts of stress and are suffering mental health issues as a result. 

Burnout is not normal. But since burnout has become a buzzword recently, and can often be misused, I want to make sure we all fully understand what burnout is. Burnout is different from being just tired, frustrated, or stressed about a situation. 

For example, there are a lot of working professionals that are stressed and frustrated with their jobs…A LOT! But not all professionals are experiencing burnout.

There are a lot of teachers stressed and frustrated with education…A LOT! But not all educators are experiencing burnout.

There are a lot of healthcare workers stressed and frustrated with the handling of the pandemic…A LOT! But not all healthcare workers are experiencing burnout. 

Burnout is the depletion of mental and physical health due to prolonged periods of stress.

Symptoms include: having trouble sleeping, continued physical exhaustion, inability to focus, no energy to handle situations, developing doubt about self competence, becoming cynical or overly critical, no desire to engage with others, increasing anxiety, developing unexplained physical ailments, and using drugs or alcohol to feel better or cope. 

Stress ebbs and flows based upon the situation, project, or season you are working through.

Burnout lingers and settles in almost like a cloud of depression and sickness.

And so you don’t get your hopes up too high about this post…there is no easy solution to burnout. There is no flip of a switch, magic pill, or new situation that will immediately fix the burnout issue. 

Why? Because true burnout buries thoughts of cynicism, despair, and even more serious issues like depression or physical ailments that require a much greater force than a new environment to remove and heal it.  

My Story of Burnout

Let me start by saying that I would consider myself a bouncy ball, not only in shape (LOL!) but in my ability to shake things off and keep moving forward. However, after three years of continued stress, my mind and my body completely crashed and burned. 

My body started to react (eyes twitching, major neck pain, terrible stomach issues, shakiness, insomnia). My mind couldn’t think clearly (lack of focus, lost words/vocabulary, decreased creativity and problem solving). I no longer had the energy or mental capacity to be productive at work or be present with my family (I began isolating myself and didn’t laugh hardly at all). The essence of who I was in spirit and personality was beginning to die off as was my physical health. My mind, my body, my marriage, and my relationship with my kids all suffered! 

Once my health started going and the doctor’s bills started coming in, I got the wake up call I needed. Burnout is not baggage I want to carry around because the weight and consequences were too heavy.

Steps to Healing From Burnout

Lay at the feet of Jesus

People are resilient, but we are also proud. Now I’m going to speak in generalities here, but we tend to think that we can do things on our own, especially armed with a great plan, research, or organized system. 

We don’t naturally go to God and ask for help because we think we know how to handle situations. And maybe that’s because some of us have a deep seated belief that "God doesn’t care about our 'little' situations" or that “God helps those who help themselves,” or that "God didn’t give us a brain for nothing so we’ll use our own brain in Jesus’ name.” The “I got this” mentality is keeping us from leaning into the greatest power source and creator of all: God. 

Jesus tells us over and over again how much He loves us, and that we need to ask, seek, knock and it will be given to us. 

“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened. Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!” ~Matthew 7:7-14 

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”  ~Matthew 11: 28-30 

“Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.” ~ Mark 11:24

“If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.” ~John 15:7

“If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.” ~James 1:5

Lay at the feet of Jesus and just let it all out. God knows everything anyway. Confess your need for control or your arrogance of thinking that you can do things on your own or whatever else God places on your heart. Confess your need for Jesus. Lay it all down and get it all out…every thought…every feeling…every bit of anger…every cuss word…every fear…every stress. Verbalize it. 

By verbalizing every negative feeling and thought before God, that becomes the figurative equivalent of laying down all the heavy baggage you have been carrying. Getting it out of your head and confessing those ugly thoughts out loud to God is the first step in healing. 

Start your day with prayer and confession! By emptying yourself before God, you then allow him to fill you back up with all the thoughts and feelings of His Spirit: love, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

To experience freedom from burnout, you need to fully experience what is already yours…the UNCONDITIONAL LOVE OF GOD. It is yours for FREE and it is CONTINUOUS. No matter your sin (we’re all sinners), no matter your past (we all have one), no matter your continued struggle (we all still struggle with the flesh)...God is the one who gives freedom from bondage of the twisted mind. 

My Journey into a Deeper Relationship with God

As you’ve read many times on the Rocks Before Sand blog posts, over the last 4 years I have spent time laying at the feet of Jesus because “I just couldn’t even function” within my own life. I began praying for God to release me of my people-pleaser, overachiever, and anxious ways, and to find peace in him instead. My prayer life grew to where I didn’t feel I would survive my chaotic days without it. I began a prayer journal pouring out my burdens and meditating on scripture and felt better. 

AND GOD! One day at a time God transformed me from the inside out. He carried me through every single situation and my crying in the shower before work…eventually stopped. My anxiety from work situations…eventually went away. My physical ailments from burnout…healed. It wasn’t overnight, but every day at the feet of Jesus transformed my mind and heart and helped the burnout feeling finally extinguish itself. 

Let me say this again, as my heart grew closer to God, my thoughts changed, my anxiety went away, and my physical ailments from burnout were healed. 

Seek help and community

While God is and should always be your first priority, God gave us family, friends, and amazing professionals to help us in our times of need. Never suffer through a situation alone. Tell your family how you are feeling and don’t feel ashamed of it. Ask friends to come sit with you in “your funk” and share what you are experiencing. Make appointments to get the professional help you may need. While “self-help” or medication should never replace your need for God, it is God that gave us amazing professionals and medicines to support us in our healing. 

Seek God and be in community with others. Share your struggles with your family and friends. Get therapy. Go to the doctor. Take medication if it is required. Take time to step away from the chaos and reset your heart and thoughts on what you know is true…we serve a great God that loves us. 

My Journey with others

I tend to be a pretty private person when it comes to how I’m “really doing.” This means that I don’t want to verbally share all my stresses or woes. But during my experience of being burned out, I couldn’t hide my feelings. I looked and acted different from my normal self. My friends and family knew that I was not ok. 

But my arrogance in thinking that I can “pull up my big girl panties and handle this” kept me from sharing my struggle with others. That’s not ok. I was choosing to carry the heavy weight of having burnout on my own. 

But God…over time of reading scripture and praying, God finally cracked me emotionally. I finally confessed everything to God…and I mean everything….my anxiety, my stress, my self-doubt, and my anger (y’all I even cussed in my prayer journal)...I immediately felt such relief. I also finally felt free to tell my loved ones how I was really feeling. 

I confessed my struggle with anxiety, my anger, my self-doubt, my physical health problems, and my inability to handle my workload. I shared it with my husband, my kids (appropriate for what they could understand), my family, my friends, and my principal. Their response was an immediate pouring out of love, support, and prayer for me. 

By confessing to God, family, and close friends I not only felt lighter but I felt more free. With each prayer lifted for me and each supportive conversation had, it was like dousing liquid love on my flames to extinguish my burnout. 

I don’t know what you’re going through right now and whether it is stress or is sliding into burnout, but what I do know is that through God and community you are loved and supported. Reach out to God and confess all the dark feelings you are experiencing. Reach out to friends, family, and professionals so they can support your path to healing. Never feel like you have to keep allowing the flames of stress to consume you at both ends of your life until you are completely burned out. Ask for help and watch how God and others come running to throw water on your flames. 

Lord God, I am broken and free falling into despair mentally and physically. I fall at your feet confessing my need for you. I cannot continue on my own strength and know that I don’t have to. So today I confess all of my darkness….. I humbly ask for transformation of my mind and the restoration of my body and spirit. Thank you for your unconditional love and for being my refuge. In Jesus’ name, Amen. 

Know Better. Do Better. Live Better. Extinguish Burnout. 

Rocks before Sand!

Scripture: 

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”  

~Matthew 11: 28-30 

Theme Song: 

Lauren Daigle - Hold on to Me Lyrics

References Used:

• The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. https://www.biblegateway.com